It is what it is, or is it?

Far too often lately I’ve been hearing the same words, “IT IS WHAT IT IS”, in reference to so many different situations. Heck, I’ve even been guilty myself of using this expression far too often. I actually started to write a post about this quite a few weeks ago and then got sidetracked with another.

It is what it is! The Urban Dictionary (http://www.urbandictionary.com/) defines it as:

"A phrase that seems to simply state the obvious but actually means "it will be what it is," as in "it ain't gonna change, so deal with it or don't."

(I took the cleaner version of the definition from urban dictionary!)

Learning to change what you can and accepting what you can’t is a great life lesson that is not such an easy one to come by. Now this lesson isn’t saying that you can't put up a fight, have your say or go to bat for what you believe in. It simply means, if you have any possible power to change something that is not right then you'd better step it up and be heard! And if you don't, then you need to find a way to accept it and move on.

Stepping up and being heard is often NOT where my issue lies.  Personally, I find I often have lots to say and will often share it with whoever will listen, sometimes whether they like it or not! The problem for many seems to be in the acceptance and moving on portion. Often times we are not prepared for an alternate outcome to a situation, we often anticipate that it will unfold in a completely different direction and when it doesn’t go as planned we have a choice as to whether we are going to deal with it or not.

Each time I hear this phrase it simply makes me want to stomp my feet and yell, “its not!” or “it doesn’t have to be”! Sometimes, it doesn’t have to be “it is what it is”, some days and some things are worth putting forth additional effort to change the outcome of whatever it may be.

Should you catch yourself using this expression (and I bet you will), be sure that you have exhausted all avenues of possible change before giving up and resorting to it being as it is. There may be some situations not worth the fight, there may be some situations that are unique and there may be times where there is nothing that you can do about it, and there are times that you have made the choice to not push further.

Unique situations happen every day and because they are “unique” there is never a cookie cutter solution, you must be prepared for an alternate outcome, often times we are not and that is where the issue really lies. It’s not the fact that you can’t change it, you simply were not prepared for the outcome and therefore not prepared to be faced with the choice to do something about it.

So, before you utter these 5 little words again, think about your situation. Can you change it? Are there steps that you can take, if so remember it only takes one step to move in a new direction. Before you simply accept something for “it is what it is”, make sure that its your choice to do so.